Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Those Rotten Squirrels, Hoarding all Their Nuts!

I can't abide these squirrels in my yard. All they do all summer is hoard nuts and seeds.Don't they understand those nuts and seeds could be useful to others, instead of just being hoarded? Selfish jerks! But, at the same time, they did the hoarding, so I suppose those nuts and seeds belong to the squirrels to do with as they please. As long as they aren't stealing the nuts and seeds from other squirrels, or the chipmunks, or other animals, it's fine. It seems they mostly find the nuts on the ground and carry them off to their hiding places. I guess they are saving it for the winter, when finding nuts and seeds is especially difficult. We do get a lot of snow here, and one never knows, does one, if the next winter will be especially bad, or rather mild. So good for the squirrels for planning ahead.


  1. Yes, but don't those selfish, hoarding squirrels realize other squirrels are suffering and in need of food too? Perhaps the needy squirrels could petition the Council of Grand Squirrels to force the hoarders to relinquish their stash of nuts and give to the less fortunate squirrels.

    I love extended metaphors.

  2. Funny too that squirrels and RATS are a part of the same order, Rodentia. So it is instinctive to be selfish, greedy hoarders. I knew we were not following/practicing the WWJD philosophy but I could never quite place it. Maybe it was WWSD all along. LOL This too might explain our desire to own all the oil in the Middle East.

    Seems like I just read that would shouldn't assign human traits to animals...LOL (jk)

  3. WTF is WWJD?

    Also, anthropomorphism is an acceptable literary device, so long as one doesn't take it too seriously.

  4. WWJD = What Would Jesus Do? WWSD = What Would Squirrels Do?

    Though truth, opinion, and feelings are often spoken/written in statements of jest, I wasn't taking any of this seriously.

  5. Ah, Jesus. Gotcha. I thought maybe it was What Would Jeff Do? which is also a good moral guide. :)

  6. LMAO! Nice try.

    Nevertheless, I'm not sure Jesus would advocate US corporations screw their shareholders, creditors, and employees by allowing the government to loot their treasuries for redistribution to the unemployed.

    Confiscating the undistributed earnings of American firms might satisfy the short term needs of the unemployed, but it would do so at the long term expense of the firm.

  7. LOL..."What would Jeff Do?"

  8. Maybe Jeff ought to do a little squirrel hunting. Rubbing out a few squirrels, especially the hoarders, might improve things.

    Don't tell anyone, but I "took care" of a little squirrel I suspected of living in my attic. And then I took his nuts.